Marriage Bible Verse of the Week - The Devil’s Foothold
Our marriages are constantly under attack. Once we say “I do”, the devil sets his sights on trying to tear the relationship apart.
The reason for this is that so much good comes from marriage. It’s the foundation of our society and the first institution established by God. What happens in our marriages usually filters down to the rest of our lives and it greatly influences our children.
The devil doesn’t want our marriages to succeed or give any sort of glory to God. So he fires shots at our relationships to disrupt it any way he can.
If you allow satan any sort of an opening, he will march right through it, guns blazing.
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
Ephesians 4:26-27 (NIV)
In this verse, it shows that anger towards our husband or wife is a huge opening for the devil to exploit.
When we go to bed angry at our spouse, we allow satan an opening into our marriage.
The word “devil” means “slanderer”. So satan will take that opportunity to suggest to us how bad, mean, or evil our spouse is. He accuses them of all sorts of things that make that anger even worse. Then upon waking up the next morning, the anger has grown.
The devil has just gained a foothold in that marriage. All he has to do is keep gaining ground a little at a time. Eventually, he will accomplish what he set out to do…destroy that marriage.
That is, only if we let him.
That’s not what God has in store for our marriages. And if we are aware of the devil’s tactics and counter them with God’s word, then we can have the successful marriages we desire. God certainly wants that for us.
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on September 21st, 2007 at 10:47 am
I have just found your website. I have been married for 27 yrs. We lost out son 9 yrs ago to an accident. My husband has shut down over the years. He has always had anger issues but we were able to work threw them. Other things have occcured in ou lives he never seems able to let anything go. It has all now come to a head. He moved out of our home 6 weeks ago and is living at his fathers. We have been counseling but it has been a slow thnig. HE finally got to a session by himself and the pastor was able to get out of him he has been angry at me since after our son died. He just has shut down with many things but now all his anger is directed at me and our marriage. I guess Im asking what to do where to turn . We need help!!! Thanks Joline
on September 25th, 2007 at 9:28 am
Joline,
I apologize for the delayed response. I was under the weather this past weekend and now trying to catch up.
I am very sorry to hear about your son’s passing and how it has affected your marriage.
I have to say that what ya’ll are going through is beyond my level of experience. I don’t want to give you some cliche answer, pretending to know what it’s like going through that or what the answer may be.
You are doing the right thing in going to counseling, which is where I would have to recommend you. I’m not sure how long it has been, but hopefully it has been forward progress since going to counseling. If it’s not, you can always check into other Christian counselors through Focus on the Family at:
http://listen.family.org/miscdaily/A000000115.cfm
Just remember, what happened is not your fault, your husband’s fault, or God’s fault. According to John 10:10 “The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows).” (AMP)
Resolve to not let the devil take anything else from you and keep seeking God in prayer and in His word. Remember Luke 1:37 “For nothing is impossible with God” and that He can save your marriage.
I hope that helps some and I’m glad you asked, that means you are seeking how to get through this.
on October 10th, 2007 at 11:28 am
Hello, I am a US Soldier currently deployed in Iraq. I have been gone now for 12 months. I had been finding it difficult to sleep at night and then I told my wife about it and it sounded like she was just distant. I asked he what was wrong and she finally told me that she did not want to do this anymore. She was saying that she has fallen out of love with me. I think it is because I am gone and have been away for a long time. I do not wish to end my marriage. I love her more than anyone could imagine. I want to make things work and she said that she would give it a try. So, now I am sending her emails on bible verses and I am praying that she is willing to just give it her all. I never wished for her to be alone but, I have to work and I have to fulfill my commitments. I do this for my family and if I could be home right now I would. She recently lost her mother and also since I have been gone her and my family have gotten into numerous arguments. Now she feels that she hurt me by not saying she doesn’t love me. Am I just in denial and say forget it?
on October 11th, 2007 at 12:01 am
Hi David,
First off, I want to let you know that we appreciate what you guys do as soldiers for our country. It’s a huge sacrifice that you make in protecting our freedoms. Thank you.
But that does put unusual strains on a marriage and family. It’s hard enough work when couples are together, and that difficulty increases with the distance. The good thing is that there is an end in sight (that at some point in time you will come home) to hold on and have hope in.
It sounds like your wife has a number of things going on in her life that are causing some distress. Sometimes, without the spouse at your side, it’s hard to handle everything coming at you. That’s actually understandable. But unfortunately, maybe she’s let these feelings and emotions start controlling her, instead of her controlling them.
Now to answer your question. DON’T GIVE UP! Don’t just say forget it. That’s the easy way out. Be a soldier for God and fight for what the devil is trying to take away from you. You’re already doing the right thing by seeking what God would have you do. Don’t even contemplate giving up. You must take the mindset that “Divorce is not an option”.
Love is not an emotion, it’s a choice. And people don’t just fall out of love, they choose not to put in the work to love, which is putting the other person ahead of oneself.
Sorry, I don’t seem to have a set of cohesive thoughts on this, but I really wanted to encourage you to not give up.
Here’s a few things that you may be able to do:
Empathize with your wife on how she may be feeling. Let her know you understand. It’s good to hear that she said she would give it a try. That’s a positive sign right there.
Pray, ask God for what you want in your marriage, thank Him for the results (even when you don’t see them), and hand the whole situation over to Him. Then ask God every day “You’re doing your part God, what do you want me to do?”
Here’s some great scriptures for you: Matthew 6:33, Philippians 4:13, 1 Peter 5:7, 1 Corinthians 15:57, Mark 11:24, and Mark 9:23.
I hope that helps and have a blessed day.
on November 18th, 2007 at 5:13 pm
PLEASE HELP! my husband and I are going through a divorce that I do not want I am so in love with my husband. we both has had infidelity in our marriage but we have forgiven and moved on. Please I want my marriage the devil is busy. I need my husband in my life
on November 21st, 2007 at 6:36 pm
Hi Sherral,
I’m sorry to hear about your situation. I’ll be praying that you and your husband let God help you find a way to stay together.
If you don’t want the divorce, then you don’t necessarily have to agree to go through with it. Let your husband know that you don’t want the divorce and that you’re willing to give it over to God and do what it takes to make the marriage work. Let him know that love is a choice and you chose to stick with him.
See if he will agree to go to a Christian marriage counselor with you to try to work it out. Even if he doesn’t agree, go yourself. As I mentioned in another comment you can check into Christian counselors through Focus on the Family at:
http://listen.family.org/miscdaily/A000000115.cfm
And make sure you hand the situation and your husband over to God’s hands (1 Peter 5:7). Pray for wisdom in what to say and how to say it to your husband.
I hope that helps a bit. Have a blessed day.
on January 21st, 2008 at 6:05 am
Me and my husband have separated and I want to save our marriage. He told me we have separated before so he do not know if he want to try again. He said he love me and he just need time to sort things out. But we have 2 children and I know God want our family to work. We have been married for 13 years. what should I do. I am hurt to the point i can’t sleep at night. I have prayed to god for answers but i don’t know what to do. please help.
on January 28th, 2008 at 6:20 pm
Hi Veronica,
Sorry for the delayed response, I’ve been very behind on things.
I’m very sorry to hear about your situation and will be praying for you, your husband, and your children.
Like I mentioned in some of my previous comments, let your husband know that you are committed to your marriage and are willing to work at it to make it better. But, you can’t make him make that same commitment, though you can let him know that you’d like the same from him. Without people willing to go through a battle together, with a commitment to see it through, the likelihood of victory is a lot lower.
Also, I know this is a stressful situation, but if you’re unable to sleep, then you are holding on to the situation instead of truly handing it over to God. Remember 1 Peter 5:7, to cast your anxiety on Him. As you truly hand it over to God and ask Him to give you steps you can take in the natural, He will do His part and give you peace as well.
I hope this helps some and I’ll be praying for ya’ll. Have a blessed week.
on May 12th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
On April 17th, my wife of 17 years left me and took our 5 children with her, they are 13, 11, 9, 6, and 4 1/2. At first I thought they were in a traffic accident, or carjacked and I panicked. When I didn’t hear from them, nor did the police or EMS, I emptied our savings account on advice from the police. I found out later that day that my wife left me and has applied for a restraining order. She wants sole custody, no visitation by me, financial support while she finishes nursing school, and child support. She said I threatened her, and committed violent acts against the children that she supposedly found about just that day.
1. I have never put my hands on my wife in anger, nor threatened to.
2. I have spanked my children, just as my wife has. Neither of us has done the things that she is accusing.
3. When I realized she wanted to be apart, I left and went to my parents house in another state.
4. I went back, emailed her and left a phone message letting her know when I would be back. She told me when I ran into her on accident that she thought I was going to try and take the kids from her forever.
5. I found out about the restraining order application a week later.
6. I WANT MY MARRIAGE TO WORK.
7. I am lost, hurt, and devastated because I can’t speak to our kids at all.
What should I do other than pray? I don’t plan on calling, emailing, texting, or writing her at all. I know she wants a separation, but I am afraid she will just give up. I plan on getting a job, and putting as much money as I can for her and the kids into our joint account that I will only deposit money into, never take money out of. Any advice.
on May 31st, 2008 at 10:40 pm
Hi Tom,
First, I apologize for my delayed response. I recently started a new job and was also out of town for a week because of it.
I’m very sorry to hear about your situation. I can imagine the hurt feelings you’re going through.
Being that I don’t know the whole story, and that I’ve not gone through a situation similar to yours, I’m not sure if I can offer a lot of advice.
What I can say is definitely pray. God wants great things for you, your wife, and your kids. Pray for wisdom to know what to do, for the Bible says that if you ask for it, God will give it.
The next thing would be to seek Godly advice. Go to your pastor, or a Christian counselor (you can find the link for finding them in the previous comments). This is a situation beyond what I can give advice to and God has people out there who are better able to help. But you have to be proactive and seek them out.
Lastly, keep believing God for the restoration of your marriage. “With God all things are possible”.
I hope that helps some and I will definitely be praying for you.